Captivating

by John & Staci Eldredge

Emasculating Women

Women pretty much fall into one of three categories: Dominating Women, Desolate Women, or Arousing women. The first two are what happens to Eve as a result of the Fall. The 3rd is a woman whose femininity is being restored by God and who offers it to others.

I mentioned Annie in The Horse Whisperer as an example of a dominating, emasculating woman. She needs nothing from her man. She has life under control she wears the pants in the family. Her message is clear:"You are weak and untrustworthy. I am strong. Let me lead and things will go fine." The effect on a man is not good. When a woman becomes controlling and not in the least vulnerable, her seduction is shut down. The message is,"Back off- I'll handle this." Any wonder that he backs off?

So many women fear the wilderness God put in their man. They are drawn to his strength but then they set about taming him once they've "caught" him. "I don't want you riding a motorcycle anymore. i don't want you hanging around your friends so much. Why do you need to go off on all those adventures?" Women who make their husbands pee sitting down.

But there are other types of emasculating women. In the movie Enchanted April, we meet 4 women - 2 who are desolate and 2 who are emasculating. Caroline is a woman who is beautiful with the kind of beauty most women envy. But hers is a severe beauty. She uses it like a weapon to get what she wants, leaving a trail of broken hearts in her wake. There is nothing soft about her. Softness is key to a woman. Not weakness - softness. Tenderness. Mrs Fisher, a wealthy widow, is the other emasculating character. she orders everyone around, runs her world like a dictator. She shows no emotion unless it is disgust in someone's apparent weakness. There is nothing alluring about her at all.

Emasculating women send a clear message:"I don't need you. I refuse to be vulnerable and inviting. You have nothing to offer me."

Desolate Women

The third character in Enchanted April is Lottie. She is not harsh - just shut down from years of living with a selfish, domineering pig of a man. She looks like a whipped puppy, rushing to please him in any way, not out of love but out of fear and some weird idea of submission. She is depressed. Rose is Lottie's friend, they meet at church. She is the Religious Woman. The typical Church Lady. She's actually quite beautiful. She dresses in such a way as to hide it. Bag - shaped dresses, hair in a bun. Her heart is also shut down. She hides behind her prayers and her "good works of service." She is weary and tired.

Desolate women don't seem at first pass to be all that emasculating. They don't attack or dominate. But neither do they allure. Their message is simply," There's nothing here for you." The lights are off, they have dimmed their radiance, no one is home. A man in her presence feels... uninvited. It's a form of rejection, emasculating to be sure. But it's harder to point out because it's so subtle.

Desolate women can also be those whose ache is what defines them. Women who will do whatever it takes to get a man. The Woman at the Well in John 4 would be an example. She moves from lover to lover trying to fill the void within her. She's available - but in a clingy, desperate way. "Groveling," as one friend said, "manipulating, begging for attention." Like the character Catherine Zeta - Jones plays in The Terminal. Their message to men is,"I need you too much. Please tell me who I am. Fill me." Men use women like this - but they do not love them. They do not feel challenged to be a Hero. Desolate women do not call the men in their lives to be Heroes.

Arousing Women

If you would be loved, be lovable - OVID

The beautiful story in Enchanted April is how each of the women actually becomes a woman indeed. Caroline softens, becomes tender and vulnerable. She no longer resents her beauty, but offers it gently, almost shyly, which for her is repentance. Lottie and Rose gain a sense of self. They become substantive, able to offer their men a real mate, not a doormat. They, too, become alluring; being less shy is repentance for them - no longer hiding but coming forward in a gentle way. The effect on e men in their lives is astounding. What severity and domineering and hiding and whining could not do, beauty does. Their men come forth as good men, repentant men. Heroes.

An arousing woman is one who calls forth the best in a man by offering who she is as a woman - someone who offers her beauty, her heart, as we described in the last chapter. Such a stark contrast is set out in the movie, A Walk in the Clouds. There are 2 women in Paul Sutton's life (played by Keanu Reeves). His wife is not an arousing woman. She pressures him,"You are not the man I want you to be." she is manipulating and demanding. Eventually she has an affair. The Hispanic woman he meets on the bus, however is alluring. Astrong and self-confident woman, she is also soft and inviting. Her message to him is,"You are an amazing man."

However it is expressed in the uniqueness of your own feminity, arousing Adam comes down to this:

Need him. And believe in him.

That is what a man needs to hear from his woman, more than anything else. I need you. I need your strength. I believe in you. You have what it takes.

An exerpt taken from http://theoutreachsingapore.blogspot.com/

As an analogy, let's take puberty. Without puberty, you were still a human being: you had 2 eyes, a nose, a mouth, you were able to move, talk, disobey and annoy your parents. :D So let's take the Christian that has not yet been filled with the Spirit. He is a child of God, loves Jesus, reads the Word, prays, and does what he can to follow Christ. That's all good and true. But with puberty, kids change. Voices deepen, characteristics that make people attractive appear, intellectual thought is stimulated and deepened, the development of the emotions rapidly increases pace (through mood changes and listening to music); the social aspect develops, where there is a stronger need to belong and find identity more than before; and in general, a deeper appreciation (or even struggle) of life as a human being. Same it is with the infilling of the Holy Spirit: when the Holy Spirit fills a person, the person changes. Suddenly all the words of Scripture "come to life". Suddenly God, and his presence, become very very real to you. Your spiritual "muscles" start to develop: you begin to tear down the works of the enemy, you find new ways of helping others in God, and even your spiritual "voice" starts to deepen, so to speak: you have a newfound sense of authority over the sin and struggles in your life and are able to command demons and strongholds to exit your life. Your knowledge of the Scriptures is stimulated--whereby God himself reveals the words of the Scripture to you in a more accelerated fashion than before. It's not that you've never had this before: it's just that you have never grown THAT fast. Your love for the church and the people of God deepens. And, above all, you develop an insatiable taste for the experience of God as he is: other-worldly, wholly other, "how unsearchable his ways and thoughts"--previously unsearchable, but now for once you have had a glimpse of his glory and his personhood and there is no looking back. Like Moses, for the first time you saw His glory: only that instead of just seeing the back, you have the promise of seeing more and more of the Front. Unlike Isaiah, who said "Woe is Me!" and had to have his lips cleansed, you stare brazen at His glory, all your shame covered by the blood of the Lamb, to see the Father's loving face in the fullness of its brightness and splendour. And then you realise, probably for the first time in your life, what it truly means to experience Him in you: such an intimacy, such an interwovenness, not theoretical but experiential, not limited but freely given to all who will partake of him. And yet that initial infilling is not the be-all and the end-all. As He fills you more and more, your sense of identity is even more interwoven in Him; your experience of Him grows that much stronger and powerful. You begin to realise the truly supernatural nature of your God, and that you have merely touched the iceberg in terms of knowing who He really is. Knowing Him becomes the lifetime quest, to know the unknowable, to search the unsearchable, the One who Is and Is to Come.

"And the things of the earth
Will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace."

And this, is merely to be filled with the Spirit, not yet even to be "full of the Spirit".

This is a good time to stop. And a good time to pray. =)

Written by

Daniel Ng


Amen to that! That's what I call growth!

So blessed!

I've really enjoyed the conversation... I'm so blessed.. so blessed by God... and it makes me want to change even more.. to become a better person in His eyes... so that I can be a blessing onto others...

Love letter to Father in heaven

Dear Father in heaven,

I just want to tell You that You are very much loved by me. Father, grant me this desire in my heart... Let me enter into a deep rest of your embrace, like a daughter in her Father's arms. Let me rest there in You, to take refuge in You, because I know, only You can grant me this peace and rest. And I know You long to tell me many things, to whisper into my ears Your Words. I pray that during this period of restoration and rest, You will show me many insights into Your heart. Empty me out, break me out of any mindset or cultural boundaries, because Lord I know You are beyond any human comprehension. Fill me in Lord. Fill me up from head to toe what belongs to You. Grant me understanding and wisdom Lord, guide me and show me Your beauty and glory. I thank you Father for hearing me out. In Jesus name, I pray, Amen!

Power of prayer within God’s will

The Lord showed me a vision during my quiet time on fri.

The golden antique key was placed into my right hand. And I asked God what does He wants me to do. He showed me this beautiful rustic treasure chest. When I used the key to unlock the chest, it was filled to the brim with many ancient scrolls. And all the scrolls were empty.

I felt prompted in my heart that the Lord will reveal His plans for us and slowly the scrolls will be filled with words. And when I check with Brother Timothy and Sister Janet on the interpretation, Brother Timothy told me that the Lord will reveal His agendas to me.

And Sister Janet gave me this verse together with sister Lizhen and sister Karine:

Matthew 18

¹⁸"I tell you the truth, whatever you bind on earth will be^[d]bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be^[e] loosed in heaven.

¹⁹"Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. ²⁰For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them."

I was greatly encouraged by the leading of the Lord. The Lord has always been so faithful! Praise God! For His mercy reigns forever and ever.

I would like to share that since Joshua camp, every night I would pray together with Ivan and the Lord would lead us through prayer. Since that week, every single prayer that we have prayed is all slowly coming to pass… part by part.

Firstly, we prayed for a balanced life for every CKRM member as we know that some of us are really struggling, and for the Friday meeting to be shifted to Saturday so that we can free up more time to evangelize and we prayed for God to speak directly to the leaders. The next thing we knew was during fri’s prayer meeting the leaders suddenly announced that there from June onwards there will only be sat and sunday services. Then suddenly Mark said he wants to spring clean his life and keep it in a balance and Caleb shared with us that he wanted to strike a balance between Word and power. Praise the Lord!

Secondly, we have been keeping this couple in prayer and the Lord just opened doors for me to minister. Out of the blue the sister called me up and confided her problems in me.

Thirdly, we prayed for this other sister and she came up to me and told me to stop praying for her because she could feel the effects of the prayers in her life! *Laughing out loud hilariously!*

Fourthly, we prayed for God to take away whatever desires Marco has which does not belong to the Lord, especially in the area of smoking. And today during service Powerboy announced that Marco has quit smoking! Wow God is sooooooooooo good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fifthly, I prayed for Ivan ‘s financial situation. And within the same week, his dad found a job!

So I would like to encourage everyone with this verse.

Matthew 7:7 (New International Version)

Ask, Seek, Knock

⁷"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.

Do you desire for His will? Seek it, claim it and never let go! For the Lord is always faithful. He is always with us forever and ever. Never will He forsake us and I really thank God for all the mercy and faithfulness which He has poured out into my life. The glory goes to God! Amen!

Hui Lian

He placed a key into my hand.

Golden antique key.

Old wooden jewellry box.

Unwritten scrolls.

Evangelist

27.05.09

Pastor Mark Tay prayed for me that I'll become a great evangelist for God and that through me many will come to know of Christ.

Captivating

Arousing Adam
The Holy, Scandalous Women of the Bible

There are 5 women mentioned in the genealogy of Jesus. Now that might not strike you as a big deal, until you understand that women are never mentioned in those genealogies. It's always men. "The father of so-and-so, the son of so-and-so." They read like baseball cards. When Matthew adds a few women to the cast, it is a major and notable exception. These women are so important to God that He has the writer break all cultural norms and even open himself to criticism and dismissal in order to make a point: "Look here - these are really good women."

Of course, Mary the mother of Jesus is mentioned. There is also the Bible-study favorite, Ruth. And two others - Rahab and Tamar. What distinguishes these women? Different situation, different acts of obedience. Yet the common theme is this: Courage, Cunning and Stunning Vulnerability. Mary is an amazing young woman. Maybe fifteen or so. She accepts the mission God brings to her even though it will cost her dearly. Really now - a young girl known to be seeing an older man turns up pregnant, claiming she is impregnated by God? She is virtuous, but her choice will be seen by others as scandalous all her life. She makes herself vulnerable - staggering vulnerable (she could be stoned for this; certainly she will be abandoned and ostracized) - in order to follow God.

Tamar's story is difficult and beautiful, one we haven't time for here. But one worth wrestling with. (You can find it in Genesis 38.) She uses cunning in the face of men who are failing her badly in order to expose their sin and invite (not demand) them to come through. Rahab is another scandalous story. She's the woman who committed treason in order to walk with God and save her family. (She hid spies of Israel when they came to her city, Jericho, on a preinvasion reconnaissance mission - in open defiance of her government.) We haven't heard any Bible studies on that one, either. "When Treason Becomes Essential for a Woman." And there is Ruth. This is how I explained her story in Wild at Heart.

Ruth, as you remember, is the daughter-in-law of a Jewish woman named Naomi. Both woman have lost their husbands and are in a pretty bad way; they have no man looking out for them, their financial stauts is below the poverty line, and they are vulnerable in many other ways as well. Things begin to look up when Ruth catches the eye of a wealthy single man named Boaz. Boaz is a good man, this we know. He offers her some protection and some food. But Boaz is not giving Ruth what she really needs - a ring.

So what does Ruth do? She seduces him. Here's the scene: The men have been working dawn till dark to bring in the barley harvest; they just finished and now it's party time. Ruth takes a bubble bath and puts on a knockout dressl then she waits for the right moment. That moment happens to be late in the evening after Boaz has had a little too much to drink: "When Boaz had finished eating and drinking and was in good spirits..." (Ruth 3:7). "Good spirits" is in there for the more conservative readers. The man is drunk, which is evident from what he does next: pass out. "...he went over to lie down at the far end of the grain pile." (3:7) What happens next is simply scandalous, the verse continues,"Ruth approached quietly, uncovered his feet and lay down."

There is no possible reading of this passage that is "soft" or "nice." This is seduction pure and simple - and God holds it up for all women to follow when He not only gives Ruth her own book in the Bible but also names her in the genealogy. Yes, there are folks that'll try to tell you that it's perfectly common for a beautiful single woman "in that culture" to approach a single man (who's had too much to drink) in the middle of the night with no one else around (the far side of the grain pile) and tuck herself under the covers. They're the same folks who'll tell you that the Song of Solomon is nothing mroe than a "theological metaphor referring to Christ and his bride." Ask them what they do with passages like "Your stature is like that of the palm, and your breasts like clusters of fruit. I said 'I will climb the palm tree; I will take hold of its fruit' " (Song 7:7-8) That's a Bible Study, right?

No, I do not think Ruth and Boaz had sex that night; I do not think anything inappropriate happened at all. But this is no fellowship potluck, either. I'm telling you that the church has really crippled women when it tells them that their beauty if vain, and they are at their feminine best when they are "serving others." A woman is at her best when she is being a woman. Boaz needs a little help getting going and Ruth has some options. She can badger him: All you do is work work work. Why won't you stand up and be a man? She can whine about it: Boaz please hurry up and marry me. She can emasculate him: I thought you were a real man; I guess I was wrong Or she can use all she is as a woman to get him to use all he's got as a man. She can arouse, inspire, energize... seduce him. Ask your man what he'd prefer.

Now, am I suggesting that a single woman spend the night at her boyfriend's apartment in order to arouse him to marry her? No. Am I saying that a married woman ought to offer herself sexually to her husband even though he's been abusive to her? No. No more than the sotry of Peter walking on the water tells us all to get a boat, go out on a lake, and give it a try. The principle of the story is what matters here. Ruth takes a risk - a risk every woman knows - when she makes herself vulnerable and alluring to Boaz. She arouses him to play the man. She awakens his desire to be the Hero. That's the point.

Rise my children, take hold of the promises. Break out of the prisons. To the green pastures I will lead you... into the promised land. Take hold of the harvest. Prepare your hearts, to receive the harvest of souls. Step out in courage for I am with you. Do my will, for my desires have been planted into your hearts.

How the Lord healed me of respiratory tract infection

It was during exam period when I started to show symptoms of cough. I had already started to show symptoms of burnt out so my immune system was pretty low, coupled with long hours of ministering each day, I felt I was stretched to the limits.

It was during the exam period when my mothers advise me out of concern to stop going to church. But instead of heeding her advice, I told her this instead, “My healing will come in parts.” In my heart I believed that the Lord is faithful, that He knows what I’ve been doing in my life and I’ll have to cling on till healing takes place.

And for that week, Brother Timonthy ministered to everyone at the pulpit and he said that there was the river of life and a tree of healing. When I reached out to grab the leaves to eat, brother Timonthy said that I was healed and I felt greatly encouraged.

Another week passed and it was during team healing when Caleb, Sharmaine and Brother Timonthy prayed for me. Initially I started vomiting. And I vomited for that entire week from wed till Sunday. And by Sunday I stopped vomiting and the Lord healed me. Praise God for His marvelous work because I know humanly it is impossible for me to recover this fast as previously I had suffered from bronchitis for months. So indeed the Lord if faithful forever and ever! Praise be to Jesus! Amen!

The Lord answered my prayers, praise God... more updates later... because I'm using my friend's lap top. ^^

Exams are Over!!!!!!

Yes!!!! Finally Exams are over! Now I got to fix my com! Woo hoo!